You’re The Rule, Not The Exception. Get Over Yourself.

I’ll never again go to the dog park with my mom.

She has an irrational fear of dogs, and happens to think that they’re all out to get her. Unfortunately I didn’t realize the intensity of this fear until we were already at the park.

There were over a dozen people there, 20 dogs, and she thinks that every single canine brain is intent upon ripping her to shreds.

So, to the intense disappointment of my dogs, we had to leave before we made a scene.

When we got into the car, I looked at her and said, ‘Mother. What makes you think that any of those dogs care about you at all? There are a ton of dogs for them to play with, plenty of sticks to chew on, infinite dirt to eat, and you’re arrogant enough to think that all they want is you?

She laughed.

It was obvious when I put it that way.

For those of you who think that the universe hates you, I’d like to ask you the same question.

What makes you think that the universe cares about you at all? Are you so arrogant to think that you’re the only person who can’t be happy/successful/start a business/blog/run a marathon?

You are not the exception.

There are few valid reasons you can’t have what others have if you put in the same amount of work and dedication.

These people you think you’ll never be able to emulate aren’t great friends with the universe. They didn’t bribe the almighty, and they aren’t blessed with an inordinate amount of luck.

They just know that they’re the rule. They can have/achieve anything and everything within their ability and they know it.

They aren’t so self-centered that they believe they’re the one person who can’t have what they want (for whatever reason).

Now, there are exceptions. There are people who simply can’t have what they want due to circumstance.

A paralyzed woman won’t be able to run a traditional marathon, no matter how hard she works at it.

My brother, who was born with slight mental retardation, will never become a rocket scientist.

A woman born without arms will not become an all-star tennis player.

These are the exceptions. Yet still, with all that they were deprived of, they find a way to be happy.

And you, who are perfectly healthy, intelligent, and fortunate enough to have a device on which to read this post, think that you’re the exception in the universe.

Well I’d like to kindly inform you that you’re not that special. The universe doesn’t really care and you can be just as happy as anyone around you, because your’e the rule, not the exception.

And finally, I would like to say, with the utmost love and respect for you as an individual:

Get over yourself. 


You’re meant to be happy. Don’t ruin it.


photo credit: NASA Goddard Photo and Video via photopin cc

{ 11 comments… add one }
  • Maris Olsen October 15, 2012, 11:53 am

    Amen! And maybe if we stopped telling young children incessantly how “special” they are, a few of them might actually learn to work hard to achieve their dreams. Most of us “average”, “non-special” people who are willing to show up, work hard every day, and practice our craft will beat out those with innate talent who won’t do the work every time. Be happy with who you are, the gifts you have been given, and get on with it!

    • Liz October 16, 2012, 10:37 am

      That’s an interesting take on it! I was coming at it from the ‘It’s just not possible for me’ angle. But there is another angle, which is ‘I’m so great, I don’t understand why I’m not successful’ angle. Both require the same thing; hard work and dedication.

      Thanks for the insight!

  • Vishnu October 15, 2012, 10:58 pm

    Great post Liz. It’s easy to feel like we are the exception a lot of times when things are not going our way but as you say – no one’s after us and we are not the exception. The formula to success remains the same for all. I am a big ‘universe’ guy haha in the sense that I think the universe can help you along the path but you’ve got to get started. And I’ve found external circumstances to be an indicator of if I’m pursuing the right goals or not. That may be a nutty belief in and of itself lol but I do understand that a lot of our goals, success are initiated by us.

    • Liz October 16, 2012, 10:43 am

      Hey Vishnu!

      I don’t think it’s nutty. It may not be my personal barometer for measuring if I’m on the right path or not, but I think that you can use whatever kind of measuring tool to determine if you’re personally on the right track.

      What’s nutty is laying around and expecting the universe to get your website done for you and make phone calls and do the laundry. 🙂

      • Maris Olsen October 16, 2012, 10:45 am

        Whh-aaat? The universe is not doing my laundry today? Dang! 😉

  • Joe Cassandra October 16, 2012, 12:37 pm

    Especially with all the politics going around, it’s easy to blame everything on everyone else and say it’s their fault you’re in a crap position in your life.

    When, really, politics doesn’t make successful people. You build your skills in whatever you want and you’ll get what you’re looking for.

    Nice playing hardball Liz!

    • Liz October 24, 2012, 7:50 pm

      Thanks Joe! And that’s a great point with politics too. Unfortunately I don’t write about politics on the blog because it’s too inflammatory right now, BUT, I would if I didn’t think it would cause a mess in my comments section.

  • zimkhitha October 16, 2012, 2:33 pm

    I lost 2 of my cousins this month. I was tempted to ask why these things are happening to my family – I quickly snapped out of it when I realised that these things happen. If bad things happen to other families, why would’nt they happen to mine? I’ve accepted what is happening as a fact of life. I now know that the universe is not out to get my family.

  • janet October 24, 2012, 1:04 pm

    great point and reminder, Liz. Thanks for that. You’re one hell of a writer, too 🙂

  • Izzy October 25, 2012, 5:22 am

    Dang Liz! You are straight up speaking the truth… Though, I guess it would be quite absurd to think you would speak in lies.

    Anyways, I love the point you drive home here. I am often blown away by how many excuses people create. There seems to be a common attitude of “us” and “them” among people who think they cannot follow their dreams.

    Content like this can help people slowly peel the onion off and eventually realize… “Maybe I can do this.”

  • Ikechi Awazie January 25, 2014, 4:36 pm

    Nice Post. A very quick reminder that we are the rule. Nothing can stop you from achieving your dreams


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